The geniuses over at Harper’s Bazaar axed this magnificent picture of Megan Fox on all fours in a swimsuit, but kept this one of her dressed like fucking The Karate Kid doing yoga in their April issue instead. Makes perfect sense… if you’re gay. Not since the Pontiac Aztek and “Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot” have such bad ideas been forced on an unsuspecting public.
Man, this was such a weird story. Remember when some dude was trying to sell pictures of Cindy Crawford’s 7-year-old daughter bound to a chair and gagged? (It was part of a game of Cops & Robbers.) Every single news outlet he approached passed on the photos because there is apparently still a shred of dignity in celebrity journalism. Then he tried repeatedly to get money out of Cindy Crawford and her husband Rande Gerber in exchange for the return of the photos. You can read our full story on it here.
In a statement Wednesday, Crawford and Gerber said, “We want to express our gratitude to the FBI, the U.S. District Attorney’s Office in Los Angeles and the German law-enforcement authorities for their coordination and efforts in this case.”
Kayalar, an aspiring German model, was charged with one count of extortion in U.S. District Court in November and surrendered to German authorities one week later. His case was tried overseas because Germany does not extradite its nationals.
Ew, I’m glad this grossness is over. Good riddance to you, jackass. The sad thing is that you’re kind of hot, and I’d probably be happy if you hit on me in a bar, until someone came over and was like, “Hey, uh, Beet? You know that’s the guy who tried to blackmail Cindy Crawford with pictures of her 7-year-old daughter bound and gagged? You know that, right?” And suddenly you would be NOT AT ALL HOT.
Peddling photos of pre-pubescent children in bondage acts = getting laid by a fellow adult FAIL
Since news of the lawsuit broke, Lindsay herself has had no comment. (And she also doesn’t have a publicist anymore.) The closest thing Lindsay’s come to making a public statement since yesterday is musing on her Twitter about the symptoms of swine flu. She’s in Paris enjoying Fashion Week, drunk (on milk, ‘natch).
So then who’s filing the lawsuit? Gawker makes the compelling case that her father and possibly mother are the ones filing the suit:
But the strange thing about the suit is that the lead attorney on the case, Stephanie Ovadia, has done legal work for Michael Lohan in the past, and Michael has repeatedly posted fulsome praise of Ovadia’s legal skills to his Twitter feed as recently as January. Last we checked, Michael was still in the midst of his famous feud with Lindsay—just last week, father and daughter were lobbing tabloid insults at one another, with Lindsay saying she didn’t speak to Michael and calling him “nuts.” So why would she seek out her dad’s lawyer just a few days later to file a $100 million lawsuit?
And her mother, Dina Lohan, gave this interview to the NY Post today:
The “Mean Girls” star was left sobbing uncontrollably when she saw an E-Trade ad on Super Bowl Sunday about a ditsy, boyfriend-stealing infant named Lindsay she believed was created in her likeness, her irate mom told The Post yesterday.
“She said, ‘Mommy, help me. This is wrong. How can they do this?’ ” Dina Lohan said of a tearful phone call with her 23-year-old daughter after the big game. …
“I’m just basically glad I took a stand. I’m not going to let them do this to us anymore,” Dina Lohan said of the “horrible” and “mean” ad.
E-Trade rejected Grey’s preferred nickname — “flank-steak woman” — just three days after the name Lindsay appeared, opting instead for the tamer “milk-a-holic.” Three months later, in the lead-up to the Super Bowl, [Grey's chief creative officer, Tor] Myhren actually still had concerns that E-Trade was being too tame in limiting his punch line. “We’re locked in,” he told me on January 8, “on everything except the very, very last word. It was something really aggressive but I thought hilarious. The girlfriend pops her head in and says, ‘Say it to my milk-a-holic face!’ I think it would have become a catchphrase, but E-Trade felt it was too aggressive. Provisionally, we have her saying ‘Milk-a-what?’ which doesn’t quite have the edge. I think it falls flat, but I hope I’m wrong.”
FASCINATING STUFF, but it all points to the frivolity of this lawsuit and the very real likelihood that Lindsay’s crazy-ass, money-grubbing parents are behind this, because their own paychecks have dried up now that their cash cow daughter can’t stay sober long enough to make any real money.
Oh, and a behind-the-scenes look at the E-Trade campaign is above. SO CUTE. Also: How much is all this publicity worth to E-Trade? Probably not $100M, but my guess is they’re enjoying this quite a bit.
I’m not going to give my speech again. You know, my don’t-do-drugs speech that I give every time we write about a celebrity overdose. But, ya know, don’t do drugs. And if you find yourself doing drugs and you find you can’t stop, askforhelp.
Corey Haim didn’t think he had a problem, but his best friend Corey Feldman did. In fact, Feldman refused to film another season of The Two Coreys with Haim until he addressed his addiction. Haim wouldn’t do that. Here’s what Corey Feldman had to say about this loss:
I was awakened at 8:30 this morning by my brother and sister knocking on my bedroom door. They informed me of the loss of my brother Corey Haim. My eyes weren’t even open all the way when the tears started streaming down my face. I am so sorry for Corey, his mother Judy, his family, my family, all of our fans, and of course my son who I will have to find a way to explain this to when he gets home from school. This is a tragic loss of a wonderful, beautiful, tormented soul, who will always be my brother, family, and best friend. We must all take this as a lesson in how we treat the people we share this world with while they are still here to make a difference. Please respect our families as we struggle and grieve through this difficult time. I hope the art Corey has left behind will be remembered as the passion of that for which he truly lived.
Corey Feldman
“The Two Coreys”
Also weighing in: Producer Nathan Folks, a close friend of Haim:
Corey was a great person that struggled with being a past child actor. The pressure this town has on people to make it is very intense and Corey struggled with drugs all of his life. He was obsessed with vicodin and pain killers. When he came to my house, that was all he wanted.
He worked really hard to overcome his addiction to illegal drugs and was very anti-drugs and was in AA and NA for years which really saddens me. But it seemed like he turned to prescription drugs instead.
I was considering him for one of my next films; he was definitely ready for a comeback. It’s really a shame, he was true victim of this town.
Corey has an adorable mother who must be in shock. She went through a lot with him and to see his legacy end like this must be painful for her.
Heeeeeeeeeey guys just a heads-up that prescription drugs are every bit as lethal — especially for an addict — as street drugs. And I’m pretty sure AA and NA both make that clear, and I’m pretty sure Corey Haim knew it. So let’s just be clear on that — Corey Haim knew the choices he was making spelled doom. I’ve never heard of a drug counselor being like “You’re in the clear with the vicodin as long as you stay away from the cocaine.” Ummm no.
Alyssa Milano, who dated Haim when they were teenagers, tweeted this: “Just woke up to the sad, sad news that Corey Haim passed away. RIP sweet boy.”
Fellow ’80s actor Ralph Macchio wrote on his Twitter, “Always so sad and disturbing when the addiction and demons prevail. RIP Corey Haim.”
Todd Bridges, who has also battled drug addiction after coming to fame as a child star in the ’80s, released a lengthy statement about Haim’s passing: “Corey Haim was a good friend of mine and he will be missed. Too many people are dying way too young and it’s sad because of the loved ones who are left behind to understand what happened and to feel the loss. I hope he’s in a better place. I will always love my Brother, and I will never judge him. I understand his pain, but I also know now there is a way out. I hope anyone who is dealing with the same stuff gets out before it’s too late. Don’t let the death of others fool you into thinking that it cannot happen to you. If you play with fire, you will get burned.”
Leif Garret, who worked with Haim in “Dickie Roberts: Former Child Star,” released a statement: “This just goes to show that whether it’s street drugs or a prescription from the doctor, that all drugs are dangerous — as we saw with my friend, Heath, as well. No matter what form, it’s not to be taken lightly. Some people are lucky enough to finish the race and others crash and burn. I do not wish this horrible disease of addiction on anybody. I send all my condolences and love to Corey’s family. May he rest in peace.”
This is so, so sad, and I’m just beyond bummed that we’ve lost yet another life to the brutal disease of addiction. Please, please remember that there is help, for the addict and for the family struggling with a loved one’s addiction. The only light of hope I see in these deaths is that they may encourage someone else to seek help for their own addiction and prevent yet another family from enduring this heartbreak.
Demi Moore is the classic “cool mom” — dating a guy fifteen years her junior, wearing hip designer clothes, and publicly teaching her daughters how to strip at a Hollywood party. All my stupid mom ever did was make brownies. According to Page Six
Demi Moore gave daughter Rumer Willis a pole-dancing lesson at a party at the Chateau Marmont hotel. A partygoer [said] that the “Striptease” star “even spun around the pole upside down.” Then Rumer gave it a whirl as Ashton Kutcher, Jennifer Aniston and Leonardo DiCaprio cheered her on. “Everyone was cheering, and Leo gave Ashton a high-five,” the source added.
I bet it was pretty easy for Rumer to swing around the pole once she really got going. When you’ve gathered up enough speed with a head that big, inertia kinda takes over and does its thing for you. There’s a lot of complex physics and kinematics involved in having a melon the size of Texas. If Einstein were still alive today, he’d probably have written a whole book about it.
Demi practicing her mothering skills in Striptease:
I bet in a pinch, you could use Mo’Nique’s calves like an industrial-sized Brillo pad to scour pots and pans. And if that didn’t work, you could always try the other end, because it’s pretty obvious she’s never met any form of grease she didn’t like. 409 and Palmolive better watch their backs, because this chick’s a regular double threat.
Apparently Hawaii is where the rainbow ends, because not one, but TWO leprechauns were spotted cavorting on the beaches there yesterday. They must keep the pot of gold in that canoe they’re paddling around in. Tricksy hobbitses!
Eighties teenage heartthrob Corey Haim was found dead in his Burbank apartment this morning. He was 38 years old. People Magazine says
Police say it is believed the actor, who had a long history of substance-abuse problems, perished from an accidental overdose at 3:30 a.m. Wednesday.
Haim shot to fame in the ’80s after starring in several teen films, including The Lost Boys, Lucas and License to Drive. Most notably, he collaborated numerous times with Corey Feldman, and the pair were dubbed “The Two Coreys.”
Death is tragic, and people get all huffy and hate-maily when you make fun of the recently deceased, so I’ll just raise this issue of Tiger Beat magazine to Corey Haim. No sense in wasting a perfectly good forty. I think Corey of all people would agree with me on that one.
Howard Stern had a pretty brutal take on it earlier this week, calling her “the most enormous fat black chick I’ve ever seen” and accusing Oprah of lying when she told “this enormous woman the size of a planet that she’s going to have a career.” (The audio is above.)
I agree with a lot of what Howard says in terms of Gabourey needing to lose weight. No one can tell that girl that she’s absolutely fine and healthy just the way she is. I’m sure she’s a beautiful spirit, and she’s obviously a brilliant actress, but she’s not going to be a brilliant actress for much longer if she doesn’t change her diet and exercise regime.
That said, a look at Gabourey’s IMDB page indicates that she’s starring in an upcoming flick called Yelling to the Sky, and this week it was announced she’ll have a recurring role opposite Laura Linney in a television show called The Big C, about a suburban mom attempting to find humor in her battle with cancer. So she’s working, which is more than most skinny, beautiful actresses in Hollywood can say for themselves.
The interesting thing about someone like Gabourey Sidibe being nominated for the best actress role, and for Oprah to so publicly endorse her, is that now you’re going to see roles written for Gabourey Sidibe. You’re going to see studios pushing for films that use actresses like Gabourey Sidibe and characters like Precious. You’re going to see those films mass-marketed, rather than tucked away at indie film festivals or marketed exclusively to the black community. What I find most interesting and potentially inspiring about Gabourey Sidibe is not that she’s black or female or overweight, but she’s really not pretty. (Your haterade goes in the comments. But it’s true.) And we never see that in Hollywood. When you look at the larger women on the Hollywood scene — black or white — you’ll notice that they all have very beautiful faces. Mo’Nique, Oprah, Queen Latifah, Jennifer Hudson, Kirstie Alley, Jessica Simpson. They all have strikingly beautiful faces. We do not put this constraint on overweight men in Hollywood. So I love that this is an opportunity for Hollywood to start putting more women who look like Gabourey on camera, because the average woman — even the average overweight or obese woman — does not have Mo’Nique’s perfect face.
I think you’re incredibly brave and awesome, Gaby, and best of luck to you, kiddo.
